89 Most Redundant, Repetitive Cliches in Music 89 - 81
- 89. Stripping Down for 'Rolling Stone'
Why, yes, we would like a little T&A to go along with that promotion, please. Nothing says "take me seriously" better than showing a little flesh on America's best-known music magazine. Just ask Janet, Christina, Britney, the Chili Peppers or ... Blind Melon? Hey, if it's good enough for John and Yoko ...
These stars don't look bad naked either - 88. Selling Out to Apple There's gotta be a reason why folks like Fiddy and Mary J. rock the iPod in their videos. Perhaps they think this obscure, struggling product needs a little more exposure?
- 87. "...palooza"
Way too many music festivals are willing to hitch their wagon to this dead horse of a suffix. Is Woodstock now charging a fee for "...stock"? Here's a question for those uncreative concert promoters: Do you really want to keep company with 'Doggie-palooza,' 'Lego-palooza,' 'Pole-a-palooza' (yes, for strippers) and, bless them, 'Algebra-palooza'?
- 86. The Post-Retirement Comeback
Club kids shed a tear when Cher hung up her wigs in '03 ... only for her to announce a Vegas residency starting in '08. Boomers shelled out mad money to see Barbra Streisand's 2000 Farewell Tour ... only to drop hundreds more to see her Comeback Tour in '06. We've been duped many times before, but come on -- did you really think Jay-Z was gonna put down the mic for good?
Watch Jigga rock the mic just for us - 85. The Drumstick Spin
The ultimate symbol of rock drummer prowess? Not a rack of 10 cymbals, not being able to maintain a complicated 6/8 beat over the entire length of a Jethro Tull flute solo, not even the Def Leppard one-handed trick -- nope, it's the drumstick spin.
- 84. Fog
Whether the lights are going down for Pink Floyd or Green Day, nothing says "we will rock you" like a stage full of dense, white smoke. Plus, it makes it nearly impossible for security to tell which fans are puffing smoke of their own.
- 83. The Third-Single Power Ballad
It's a well-documented fact that any successful album's third single will be a power ballad. Doesn't matter if it's rock, pop or even R&B. Country albums are exempt from this phenomenon, however, as they're 50 percent power ballad already.
The Culprits:U2's 'One'No Doubt's 'Don't Speak'Beyonce's 'Irreplacable'
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82. Rock Dudes Throwing Up Hand Signs
Hinder
Nickelback
Tommy Lee - 81. Broadway Going Rock
ABBA on Broadway makes an iota of sense -- those songs are half show-tune anyway.
But theatrical producers are so desperate for tourist dollars that they've cobbled together threadbare musicals based on Dylan, Lennon, the Beach Boys, even the Four Freakin' Seasons. Could be why accomplished thespians like Sebastian Bach want nothing to do with Broadway anymore.